Strength or Saboteur?

Let’s begin Episode #154 with some insights

💡 Aha Moment of the Week

The cohort of The Behavioural Edge Program in Mumbai this weekend experienced insights and reflections on how their strengths, when overused , start sabotaging their goals:

“Be aware of your default patterns of thinking – not only the ones which are limiting, but also the ones which have usually worked in your favour!”

🧠 Thoughtful Thought

“What a Trigger triggers in you is already within you!” — Thoughtfully Yours

For your daily dose of Thoughtful Thoughts, get your Thoughtful Calendar here.

💬 NLP Quote Corner

“Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted counts.” — Albert Einstein

⏳ One Minute NLP – Your Reticular Activating System

Have you ever noticed that once you decide to buy a certain car, you suddenly start seeing it everywhere? That’s not coincidence. That’s your brain filtering reality.

In NLP, we talk about the Reticular Activating System—the part of your brain that decides what gets your attention. It filters millions of bits of information and highlights what matches your focus.

So here’s the real question. What are you training it to notice? Problems? Obstacles? Criticism? Or opportunities? Growth? Support?

If you keep telling yourself, “Nothing is working,” your brain will find proof. If you start asking, “Where is progress already happening?” your mind will show you evidence.

Your focus becomes your filter. Your filter shapes your experience.

In NLP, change doesn’t always begin outside. It begins by deciding what your mind is allowed to notice.

🔮 Meta Magic – Coaching Chronicles

Strength or Saboteur?

He walked into the session with the composure of someone who carried too much responsibility — and wore it well.

A Senior Director. Sharp. Respected. High-performing.

But that day, his voice carried fatigue.

“My biggest weakness?” he said without hesitation. “Time management. I never get to the important work. My days are consumed by urgency. Constant firefighting. Something is always on fire.”

He spoke the way many leaders do — convinced the problem was external. Deadlines. Demands. Escalations. People.

A typical coaching conversation could have gone down familiar lanes:
“What’s not working?”
“How do we prioritise?”
“What system can we build?”

But something in his tone — the way he described dropping everything to respond — held a different pattern.

So instead of exploring the weakness further, I shifted direction.

“Tell me about your strengths.”

His posture changed instantly. Energy rose.

“I’m extremely flexible,” he said proudly. “And I’m always available for my team. They know they can reach me anytime. That’s what makes me effective.”

There it was.

The very thing he valued most.

I let the moment breathe before asking the question that altered the trajectory of the session.

“How much role is this strength playing in your weakness?”

He frowned slightly. “What do you mean?”

“How much of your time management challenge,” I continued gently, “is happening because you are flexible… because you are always available?”

Silence.

Not defensive silence.
Reflective silence.

He leaned back.

For the first time, he wasn’t fighting fires in his calendar.
He was observing the pattern behind them.

His strength — availability — had quietly trained his environment to expect instant access.

His flexibility had become permission for interruption.

His leadership had turned reactive, not because he lacked discipline…
but because he had overused what once made him exceptional.

That was his Aha.

Not all weaknesses are deficits.

Sometimes, they are strengths used without boundaries.

And the real growth begins
when you ask yourself —

Where is my greatest strength creating my biggest constraint?

📖 Hook from the Book

“Death is a state of mind—many people on Earth spend their entire lives dead.” — Gabrielle Zevin, Elsewhere

🎬 Movie Motivation

“There is no spoon.” This dialogue from The Matrix emphasises that reality is filtered through perception.

🏆 Winning Post of the Week

How to Read People’s Emotional Triggers & Adjust Your Message for Maximum Influence

PS: Missed the past issues of NLP Around You? Find them all here: https://w3coach.com/nlparoundyou/

Thoughtfully Yours,